Highly dubious futures

My mother recently returned home after visiting us for the holidays. Before she left, she expressed her admiration at how well my daughter listens to my admonitions. "I can see already that she will turn out alright," she concluded.

I expressed my doubts. The fact that a 1 year-old obeys her father's commands—and only usually, at that—suggests very little about her future. We still have the terrible twos to endure, to say nothing of the trepidatious teens.

It does amaze me how quickly my daughter ceases to obey. She likes to lift a foot and place it before her, on top of the high chair's tray. Ножка! I bark, and she removes her foot and places it back down, watching me carefully the whole time. A few moments later she's forgotten and the foot goes back onto the tray. Ножка! I bark again, and she removes her foot...

The same goes for when she decides to stand on a chair. She's a little more devious in that case; she'll sit down, but watch me carefully. The moment she thinks I'm not looking, she'll try to stand again. I can't imagine what a solution to this might be, short of amputating her feet or something along those lines.

That's nothing. Hands-down the best example was when she wanted to grab Christmas-tree lights and place them in her mouth. After I barked at her, she pulled the window curtain in front of her, and reached out for the lights again. After all, if she can't see me, I can't see her, right?

Children: living proof that, if nothing else, we Catholics have the doctrine of original sin right.